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Hey, Man..It's Dialogue:  Making or Breaking the Text

8/24/2014

16 Comments

 

Writing dialogue within a story is something I rather enjoy.  Perhaps it has something to do with watching a character come alive and develop a personality.  I try to create dialogue that is as genuine and realistic as possible.  It's not always easy to write out sentences that look as good when they're read as they would if spoken aloud.  So often times my characters have many of the little speech habits I may have.  Things like using the words "man" or "dude" are very common in my real life vocabulary.  I've just always used them to emphasize and address, but not every one of my characters should be speaking like I do, so I try and pay attention to other people's speech patterns, in particular when watching movies. 

I love dialogue in movies.  Some of my favorite movies are dialogue driven.  Being a writer, I tend to pay attention to the dialogue from a different perspective than most.  I'm critiquing it the whole time; much like a grammar Nazi may read a heartfelt letter.  Movies like Tape and Spring Forward come to mind.  Tape is filmed with 3 characters, and the entire film takes place in a single, small hotel room.  Sounds boring doesn't it?  It's not.  It's amazing.  Both the acting and the dialogue is excellent.  I bring up movies because the very beginning stage of a film is a written story, a screenplay/script that is often overlooked and taken for granted by a large amount of viewers. 
 Of course for film, if the actor can't pull it off then it's butchered regardless of how well written the script may be.  Actually, sometimes it's the director's fault.  Case in point:  I wouldn't call Mark Wahlberg an Oscar-winning actor, but if you look at his stellar performance in Boogie Nights vs. the laughable tripe that is The Happening, it's clear Mr. M. Night Shyamalan doesn't always get his actor's mojo going, whereas P.T. Anderson makes everyone shine.

This piece of dialogue comes from a story I wrote that will be available early November 2014: 

Forcing myself to cut the healthy laugh short, I replied to Johnny's last statement.  "Okay man, details.  Let's hear them.  Her boyfriend not showing up in the bathroom mirror?"  I started to chuckle again but successfully held most of it back.  Snot nearly shot out my nose in the attempt.

"It's not like that.  That's a fallacy."

"A what?"

"It's not true.  The whole vampires and mirrors thing.  It doesn't work like that.  That's all a myth."

"Yeah, myth is right."  I started to laugh once more.

Johnny shook his head.  "Angela brought him home for the Christmas Eve meal.  He's cold.  He's pale.  He smells like coconuts, wears sunglasses, and he just stood at the door until my dad welcomed him in."

"So, a polite albino with good hygiene, standing in 30-degree weather who isn't a fan of being snow blind and you come up with vampire?"



Though it's meant to be lighthearted and humorous, depending on who reads this and how they read it, it could come across different than expected

This week I watched a video on youtube of Stephen King reading an unpublished short story he had written.  He read it very well, perfect emphasis exactly where it needed to be with tones and mannerisms pointing to dry humor that could easily be missed.  I noticed as I watched, that had I read the story myself I think I would have missed some of the cues to laugh.  Text can do that.  How many of us have gotten our feelings hurt or in an argument as a result of purely text?  They're more than monotone...They're toneless, emotionless, and can easily be read wrong. I suppose reading things differently is just another thing that makes us all unique.
QUICK UPDATE: 
  •  My story "Self-Immolation" will be published in Shadows & Light #4 out this September/October.
  • I am now the admin for Horror Novel Review's Facebook page.  Feel free to hit the Facebook link and "like" their page.  Along with work, family, and writing, this will add a bit more to my daily schedule.
16 Comments
Dannie B.
8/24/2014 01:37:26 am

I know exactly what you mean. Often times I'll wonder if certain movies wouldn't have been much better if only a different director (or actor) was involved.

Reply
Chad
8/24/2014 01:41:07 am

I'll bet The Happening would have been one of those movies had they stepped it up a notch or three (and had a different ending :)

Reply
B. Lawrence
8/24/2014 01:38:52 am

Nice piece of dialogue you've written there....When can we see that?....I love Stephen King!

Reply
Chad
8/24/2014 01:53:10 am

Thanks B! It'll be in an anthology this November. I'll keep you posted. I think my two favorite King books are The Green Mile and Eyes of the Dragon, though I haven't read The Stand yet so that could change from what I hear :)

Reply
Marty
8/24/2014 03:00:42 am

Looks like I'm not the only one who hated Marky Mark in that movie. I'll have to check out Tape and Spring Forward. They sound like my kind of movies.

Reply
Chad
8/24/2014 04:28:27 am

Two of my faves! Enjoy!

Reply
Donn R Sonnsen
8/24/2014 03:13:44 am

Great post!!

Reply
Chad
8/24/2014 04:28:48 am

Thanks, Donn! I appreciate it!

Reply
Maria Quinn
8/24/2014 06:31:41 am

I watched King read that, and I've seen him read other stuff. Some of it does come out different as the author than the consumer/reader. Good posting.

Reply
Chad
8/24/2014 09:36:44 am

Thanks, Maria!

Reply
Dan Padavona link
8/26/2014 08:42:11 am

This simple bit of dialogue by Pennywise the Clown in Stephen King's IT always gives me the chills -

“We all float down here!”

Also, the written "dialogue" / haiku from Ben to Bev -

“Your hair is winter fire
January embers
My heart burns there, too.”

Reply
Chad
8/26/2014 12:47:15 pm

I'm creeped and haven't even read it..lol..I think one of the reason I've waited so long to read it is because I was waiting to forget the movie.

Reply
Dan Padavona link
8/26/2014 03:52:31 pm

How about...

"The blackest eyes; the Devil's eyes."

- Halloween (1978)

Reply
Chad
8/27/2014 01:31:04 am

In my top 10 favorite horror films!

Reply
Scout R.
8/29/2014 11:21:57 am

PT Anderson is absolutely amazing!

Reply
Chad
8/30/2014 01:39:26 am

You got that right!

Reply



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